It’s a crisp November day outside. Up until now the warmth of late summer has hung its hat on Virginia’s autumn. But, fall chill descended last night and the breezy gusts feel polar in comparison to our 80 degree highs of last week.
“Be careful!” I warn my husband as I watch him nearly fall.
He loves to walk in our crunchy woods. Fallen leaves, a carpet of splashed reds and yellows underfoot hide tree roots and rocks.
“It’s not how many times you trip, it’s how many times you catch yourself,” he throws over his shoulder at me as we slide and stumble over the uneven ground.
He enjoys sitting on a tree stump and gazing at God’s beauty in Virginia’s nature around us. My eyes instead, are trained on what I feel. And I feel a lot on the raised hair of legs and arms.
A black cloud of mosquitoes buzz around me. I slap and scratch. They ignore Phil. Apparently his blood isn’t as sweet as mine, which does not accurately reflect our characters.
And as I try to take in the magnificence of blue sky and hill covered autumn colors, I feel the tingling of what I believe to be an ant or possibly a tick working its way up my leg.
But the clinchers always are the spiders. I send a big hairy brown thing across the border with an appropriate shriek.
All the hopping and jerking is exhausting. I do so want to be a nature fan.
I turn my eyes with longing back to where we came from. It’s difficult to even look beyond at the hills to enjoy the view. Some of you may understand me, but I’d wager that more of you would find the quiet of a fallen log out in a tree-filled, bug infested walk pure heaven, like a royal throne which feels close to the Creator. As does my dear husband. As I wish I would.
“So peaceful,” he breathes, while I jerk, swat, and screech.
I pull my legs up into the air to let a snake go by. At least there could be snakes going by. Highways for all sorts of things zig-zag under a canopy of leaves.
It’s not that I cannot appreciate the beauty, but it’s more like I have to work extra hard to get past the obstacles of the journey to recognize it.
This morning I read,
“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?” Psalm 56:3-4 ESV
David faced enemies out to get him in much more dire situations on his journey than the creepy-crawlies of a Virginia path. He faced the Philistines who had captured him and wished him dead.
My path, and I’m sure yours as well, often takes detours on which I’d rather not travel. They place me where I don’t enjoy sitting, waiting, and wondering. And fear, as if it had substance, brushes against me. It infiltrates my mind and takes residence in my heart.
David faced that over and over again. In caves, in palaces, and on the road from one hiding place to another. He felt fear. But, he knew what to do with it. He knew where to find the answer. He knew Who to trust.When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. Psalm 56:3 ESV Share on X
Our anxious souls calm when fear raises its eyes beyond what is seen, beyond the physical and tangible, to rest on a higher unseen reality.
David put his trust in God. He practiced it with praise, and filled his heart with truth. What can man do to me? He asked while his enemies had the power to actually do a whole lot of bad to him. How could he voice such trust? He knew His God would be enough for whatever lay ahead.
I don’t face anything in comparison to the struggles David did, but I do battle fear on the journey He has set before me. Unlike the willies from what is currently crawling up my neck, genuine fear stymies trust and at times paralyzes me with uncertainty. It reveals my weak and vulnerable heart.
And though I turn my eyes longingly back at the road I came from, Jesus invites me to take a walk with Him through these woods ahead. He offers a comforting hand to hold, He reaches down and lifts me over the hidden rocks and snaking roots. He reminds me He is Sovereign Creator of all I see and all I don’t see. He calls for praise when I don’t even know how or where the journey ends.
Because He is worthy of such trust. Because no matter the road, He walks it too.
Andee
Every time you write, the words hit my heart. This time with gratitude you are transparent about your fears, whether outside in nature or internally in your heart.
“Because He is worthy of such trust. Because no matter the road, He walks it too.” Spot on reminders that encouraged my weak and vulnerable heart today.